During my first week on my first job I was always on the verge of tears. It was a decent job but I’d come home and cry. Why?
For the first time I felt an entire third or more of my day being devoted to someone ELSE. I missed the spiritual ME time.
One prayer in particular stands out in my memory (and this is from over a decade ago). I remember asking God–when will I have time to dedicate to You again? Look at my days–work and nothing else! This is making me empty. I want to spend time in prayer and Quran. Please help me!
Fast-forward a few years and I had fully embraced the rat race and forgotten all about my spiritual aims. But then life wouldn’t let everything just continue as it was, would it?
Nope. It was time to leave the rat race. And this time I cried because I DIDN’T want to leave. I WANTED to be in this soul-numbing routine. (I was so numb by then that I didn’t realise I was numb.) I was thoroughly put out by this “loss” after spending 4 years getting a relevant Bachelors degree and more years than that in the industry.
I was stuck at home, with no job to go to. So I scrambled around, trying to find meaning again. VERY long story short-–I took on a new path, trained for FIVE more years and became a certified Quran coach.
Today I am honoured to be teaching the Quran to young and old. I am blessed that my work is about hearing the Quran, reciting the Quran, translating the Quran, memorising the Quran, encouraging others on their Quran memorisation, and writing about the Quran. I am fortunate to be in a job that recommends a perpetual state of ritual ablution and self-awareness.
A good chunk of my day now goes to serving my soul. My prayer from a decade ago had been answered–but it happened in such a way that I cried instead of realising that it was something I had fervently prayed for.
Today I cry about other things. Sometimes I remember this lesson, and sometimes I don’t.
What about you? Are you crying about a situation that is actually an answer to a prayer? Do you remember a time when you finally spotted the blessing in disguise?